Thailand 2005 or How Sean Went on Holiday and Never Came Home

thailand 2005

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Blog - English Camp (Again)

blog english camp

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Fallons on Tour - Photo Montage

Fallons on tour

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Coming Soon

Coming Soon

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Chapter 6: English Camp 2

Chapter 5: Weekly Update

Profiles

I promised personal profiles so here you are:

Paddy 'Bizzle' Best
Likes: Peace and quiet, ale
Dislikes: Jimmy, being tarred with the same brush as the lads
Weaknesses: Can't handle his ale
Personal Quotes: 'Eating's Cheating' - he regretted this later







Daz 'I like to hug and kiss men' Kewley.
Likes: Hugging and kissing men
Dislikes: Not hugging and kissing men.
Weaknesses: Can't stop himself from hugging and kissing men
Personal Quotes: "I like to hug and kiss men."

David 'Didge' Forster.
Likes: Destroying hotel rooms, simulating rape upon the lads when they're trying to sleep and celebrating his mother/father/nan or auntie's birthday every weekend of the year as an excuse to gib off early.
Dislikes: Women with standards
Weaknesses: Screams in his sleep.
Personal Quotes: "Matty, why don't you just die?"

Matthew 'Whelan' Whelan
Likes: Birds, music, mates and alchemy of the purest evil intent
Dislikes: Birds who he can't sleep with, shit music, shit mates and alchemy of the purest good intent.
Weaknesses: Kryptonite, hammers and Kryptonite Hammers.
Personal Quotes: "When i pull a girl the first thing that goes through my head is 'how dirty is this bitch?' then i just start thinking about turning base metals into gold"



Andy 'Nice Face' Knight
Likes: Destruction of a physical, emotional or mental level.
Dislikes: Not being able to cause as much destruction these days now that hes become the most mature member of the group.
Weaknesses: Hair waxing, Jeffrey having control of beads belonging to his mother.
Personal Quotes: "Chunky, where's my mars bar?"

Matty 'Smash' Davies
Likes: Smashing
Dislikes: Things that can't be smashed i.e. the laws of gravity, racial injustice etc.
Weaknesses: Has massive hands but has yet to, without the aid of tools, dig a hole big enough to impress the God of Massive Hands - FingeXerxes
Personal Quote: "WHY? Why can i not smash my own shortcomings as a man?"

Nick 'Horse Balls' Wilkie
Likes: Computers...oh how he likes computers, weighing his balls
Dislikes: Tying his laces in public, the fact that with huge balls come huge responsibility
Weaknesses: EMPs, pigeons
Personal Quote: "Oh man, i broke my computer with my massive balls'

Jimmy 'The Little Shit' Wynn
Likes: Being a little shit, Andy's acceptance, having a voice that can cut glass
Dislikes: Not being Andy Knight, peace and quiet
Weaknesses: Knees
Personal Quote: "BROWN SUGAR!!!!

Jamie 'Paz' Parry

Likes: Football, Red Rooster

Dislikes: Being a drunken mess who gets carried everywhere after drinking too much Red Rooster

Weaknesses: Drinks too much Red Rooster

Personal Quote: "Yeah! I love Red Rooster! Shabba!"

Michelle 'Chelle' Taylor

Likes: Paz, Girly stuff, having magnificent breasts

Dislikes: Nick as she believes he is planning to steal her car

Weaknesses: Paranoia, secret drinking/drug problem which causes her to be angry all the time

Personal Quote: "Hey! Stay away from my car you big-balled bastard or i'll break ya legs"

Chris 'Daddy' Mulhall

Likes: Blowing people's minds, dressing like a dad

Dislikes: Having his mind blown, being called a dad

Weaknesses: None; if you were to kill Chris two more equally powerful Chris' would rise up in his place

Personal Quote: "Is this cardigan too snazzy?"

Ben 'Lightning' White

Likes: Bullying Chim, writing songs about Sean with titles such as 'Sean's gay' and 'Sean smells'

Dislikes: Losing, punctuality

Weaknesses: Moonlight reveals his true form

Personal Quote: "Come try this banana cake, it's like f**king heroin"

Richard 'Bad News' Hughes

Likes: Being bad news

Dislikes: Being good news

Weaknesses: No self control of any kind

Personal Quote: "Someone else is talking to a girl...this must be stopped.'

Chapter 4: A Day in Thailand (part one)

Chapter 3: P.R.C.

This blog was originally supposed to have narration but when i added it it was a bit crap so put the music in instead...any questions about this blogs then email me at Seanfallon01@hotmail.com

Chapter 2: English Camp

Chapter 1: New Years and Suspected Nonces

Welcome: The Better Thailand Blog

Read a weird thing on the wall of a restaurant before - 'I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal lobotomy.'

The wall was full of them, wise little titbits from travellers about 'peace' and 'love', extracts from poems and Bob Dylan songs. I'm not sure why but I was fascinated by them for a simple reason: who are these tossers and why would you take a marker pen into a restaurant. I've been in bars on the islands before that encourage this kind of thing on the bar top by having little felt pens next to the napkins but this place - The Chiang Mai Saloon - didn't seem to offer this service and yet the writing was everywhere, which implies a conversation occurred possibly something like this:

Traveller type (i.e. dreadlocks, crap beard, Thai pants that look like pyjamas and weird shoes that at some point I will provide you with a picture of) walks into a bar and says:
Excuse me, I was wondering if I could borrow a pen, y'see I've got something I need to say and the only way I could possibly express it is by writing on your walls, its basically this I wanna write 'I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal lobotomy.' Just there next to that table on the wall in massive letters so anyone who sits there can read it and bathe in my wisdom.

Thai waitress just stands there for a second and says: Get out.

Welcome to the better Thailand blog (and by better I don’t mean better than Ben's before he has a hissy fit, I mean better than my Myspace one). Recently, with Leah gone and my work becoming much busier, I've been trying to fill my time to avoid becoming the zombie I was when I worked in the upper department and never seemed to have anything to do. A clear example of this has been Toffee Diamond (visit Myspace.com/ToffeeDiamond to see it), my Christmas video and my New Year's video (available on Myspace.com/Hernandez_delacroix) and, yeah, there will be video elements in play on this blog as well most of the time just to clarify a point or show off.

So before we begin I thought I'd give a cast of characters of sorts so everyone could know who I was talking about as these will be my main subjects with other people drifting in and out of this storyline, and by storyline I mean my life:

Me - Everyone knows me.








Ben - The dude who lives above me. He speaks Thai, plays guitar and is the boyfriend of Chim. He works at my school and teaches the students two years above mine.






Chim - Ben's girlfriend. An insurance broker of sorts who I spend most of my time tormenting with crude jokes and moderate violence though I still maintain that she started it.






Leah - My girlfriend. Currently living near Seattle on a hippy commune. Is 18 and therefore 9 years younger than Ben's girlfriend though Chim looks nine years younger than a two month old baby.





The Boys - The boys from back home. Never before has there been such a wretched hive of scum and villainy. Individual profiles will appear on this page some other time.





Of course other people will be mentioned and they'll get pictures and 'funny' little bios when they do something relevant enough to get into the blog...

For now though, goodbye until next time which hopefully should be an actual blog telling a better and less pointless story than this one...